Shade Shape

If all decor items were part of a jungle, then lampshades would be hippos. Keep with me here.

Hippos are silent types, right? So are lampshades. And if the hippo isn't in it's happy place...everybody knows about it...if a lampshade isn't sunny...people also can tell. Plus there is a christmas song about hippos...which makes me smile...there is also an entire aisle in Walmart for lampshades...which also makes me smile. And get this...that aisle...yeah, it's as wide as (you guessed it) a Hippo.

So anyhoo. The hippo...err...lampshade that was in our den alluminating our little storage dresser had a beige lampshade on it. But the pink undertone of the shade was not getting along with the green undertones of the paint color. I know you can't tell, but trust me...the clash was bigger than Kristi Allen's chinese takeout box.



After a little research I ran out to grab a square empire shade from Target. I wanted to get a square shade because the basement door could open and hit a round shade. Plus the linear shape accented the squares of the mirror and the squares of the birdcage and the squares of the books. Yes, lots of squares here. So that's when it hit me...maybe I could share my lamp shade research with you.

So here are the six main shade shapes that I found and some info on each of them. After reading this you will be well equipped to choose your shade, and all of the calories you consumed today will not count. Cause that's how I roll :)

First up is the bell shape. The bell shape is the most popular of the lampshades and also in my opinion the most traditional and formal. The features of a bell shade are that the top ring of the frame is smaller than the bottom ring and the vertical lines of the shade are curved rather than straight. The curved lines create an arc or a bell shape. (duh Katie.) This flared design allows the light to travel down rather than up...which is good if you are using this shade for a reading area or a spot that you want the attention to be on what is below the shade...such as a buffet or a desk. Or in an area where space is tight...like a stray corner or a bookcase.


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Next we have my personal favorite - the drum shade. The drum shape is evident with a frame that has both the same sized upper and lower rings. Although some drum shades have rings that are slightly different size. The drum shade is great for general illumination areas such as sidetables, nightstands, and even bathrooms where you want the light to spread up and down. I like it because it looks the most clean and classic.


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Up to bat is the empire shade...not to be confused with umpire shades...or vampire shades...which do not exist :) The empire shade is the BFF of the bell shade. Both have upper rings that are smaller than the lower rings, but the empire shade does not have the flare of it's friend. It has straight lines that make it a more casual and less stuffy. My favorite spots for empire shades are in laidback family rooms, sunrooms, and even in the kitchen.


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Ovals are fatties from the front and Posh Spices from the side. The oval drum shade below is a perfect example of how to pair this shade with a base. The fact that they take up visual room without actually taking up space makes this shade a perfect piece for sideboards, small nightstands, and any other place that your furniture real estate is tight.


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Usually paired with a rectangle lamp base, the rectangle shaped shade is masculine and contemporary. The oval and sexy recty are one in the same for uses. If you decide that this is the shade for you - make sure you keep an eye out for a loose harps (the doohicky with two arms that you can clip shades into) as this puppy is easy to get askewed. Those horizontal lines always need to be level with the furniture!


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Lastly we have the square. Yes, currently the shape that I chose for my den. Like I said before, the clean lines help this geometric shade retain a manly feel as well as appeal to the masses. It is hip to be square :) yes, the cheese flows through my veins.


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So there you have it folks - a tutorial on shade shape. Hope this was as helpful to you as it will be for me after I forget everything. One thing I won't forget - drum shades are my bacon. They are so delish. So what is your favorite?

Oh - and boys...if your wife starts singing "I wanna hippotomus for Christmas"....yeah...here's a tip - she ain't talking about a water buffalo :) Us women are so shady...heehee!

Secret Project Reveal

Remember all the clues? Yeah, the clues I gave you about the secret project I have been diligently working on? Right. Those clues.

Well, I am ridiculously ready for this grand reveal. But first let's review the before:


Before it had lineoleum flooring. yes. It was gross. Sure, it didn't look gross in pictures but trust me...it was. In fact, it was the same flooring that continued into our kitchen before we ripped it out and laid hardwood. Which actually added to our problem. The hardwood was 3/4" higher than the linoleum...trip city (and I ain't talking about McConaughey's bongo). Oh and did I mention it was ripped?


Under my new bathroom cabinet was a giant gash. Everytime we swiffered, the snag would cling to dirt like Madonna to her yoga mat. Eventually the buildup was disgusting. Note the grossness in the corner...eww. So naturally it needed a makeover.

Enter moodboard options:

Obviously the tile choice had to go with my existing paint color (because I love it) and my white beadboard cabinet and the flooring in the hall (which it meets up to at the door). The first option was my favorite of the tiles...bring on the hexagon! But the priciest of the options as well. Three times the cost of the others and not appealing to all future buyers.

Option 2 was the most standard option being a porcelain ceramic tile. Since it was uber durable, this would definitely hold up well and still bring a light feeling into the room. Affordable, appeals to the masses and still brought warmth into the space. Obviously the least creative option as well.

Option 3 was a dark slate tile that would pick up the blues on the walls. Dramatic, enduring and also appeals to the masses. However the blue undertoned color might give the room a stark feel (no natural light + blues everywhere = ultra cool...and when I say "cool" I mean "not inviting" instead of "awesome like Blossom".)


After a quick consult with my boyfriend, we went with Option 2.


We picked out a couple options that 'spoke to us'. I liked the english muffin tile - lighter colored with tons of nooks and crannys. Jeremy like the bagel - smooth, warmer colored and little variations. I won.

What really sealed the deal was the fact that we had leftover white grout from our kitchen backsplash project. And white went better with the lighter beige tile than the darker beige or the slate.

So now that you know what we chose, let's get to the reveal. Afterall, my bathroom is screaming like Speidi - "I AM READY FOR MY CLOSEUP!"




Wonder what we did? Ok. Here's a recap:



Wanna know the best part? I did 90% of the work all by myself. GIRL BOWER POWER! My dear husband did change the door hardware and trimmed the bottom of the door (which I could have done) and he helped me lift the old toilet off and put the new one on (which I could have done with another girl) and he carried the sink out to the kitchen (which I could have done with another girl) and he screwed in the toilet bolts (which I could have done). I am saying that I could have done this not because I am ridiculously competitive at times (which is true). I am sayin' it because you women COULD DO THIS! Believe me...I am slightly above a down syndrome intelligence level. If I can do it....you can do it better.

Ok - back to the bathroom. I have tons of photos & info to share from this bathroom redo (including the budget breakdown) so if you wanna see all the details - stay tuned!

A Farrah Faucet

Our guest bathroom was 98% completed. To put this in perspective, Megan Fox is 98% of Angelina. Not the same thing, right? Same applies to home renovations. Some say work hard. Some say play hard. I say "Reno hard".

So our bathroom...on the left is the photo before. The right has some small changes...one renovation change in particular.


That's right! I now have fairer (or Farrah) faucets! And the proper knowledge of how to use the white balance on my camera :)


Before, I had the basic builder-grade silver toned faucets. Totally not groovy with the oil-rubbed bronze accents that were floating around the room. Since the shower curtain rod, the vanity knobs, the towel rack, the toilet paper holder, the light fixture and the misc. bathroom accents were luscious and dark, the shiny nickel spigots stood out like a sore thumb. Not cool.


So I decided to do something that I have never done before. I ebayed. And I am so glad that I did. I found a seller that sold this good looking feller and shipped it to me for free! Not only did I save by not shelling out a single red cent for shipping but I also got each faucet for the low price of $54! You may not scour home improvement stores websites like I do, but rest assured this is an amazing price. In fact, the lowest Lowe's bathroom faucet in oil-rubbed bronze was $108. I love Lowe's but I gotta go with the price that is easier on the wallet. So just like the Olsen parents, I got two for the price of one.


Just wanted to show you how beautimus this baby looks from the top! I don't usually say this about drain holes, or holes in general, but yum! Just look at that deep chocolate color...delish!

The best part is that it looks like a really expensive improvement but really it took only a little over a hundred bones and 30 minutes to install (yes, installation instructions came with the lovely water spouts). In the end, it improves the richness of the room and that my dears, is priceless :)

Have you made faucet decisions lately? Where is your favorite place to score a good deal? And dude, is ebay the best or what?!?

Side Table Makeover

All ya'll tired of seeing the little transformations that I do in my spare time? Or is it the Boston in your cream pie? Just wondering. Here's another piece that called reno 911.


I got this sucker for $5. Most people would have looked right past it...and did at the local Goodwill. Apparently a previous owner thought it would be a good idea to strip it and started the process. Five minutes later they quit and this puppy ended up between the 1980's electronics and the used bedpan...eww. And it came with a free coat of dried varnish-remover. yipee.



But she has good bones. She's like a good woman. Sturdy. Classic lines. A bit of curve where it counts. Real. Solid. Been around the block. You know the type. And when the barn needs painting, you whip out the white, right?!? So that is exactly what I did.



And I put her in the office. I also switched back the throw pillows to the lighter more summery version. It was a nice little change. Plus, I really like the way the round table sets off the round captains wheel on the wall. I need to get rid of the rug.


And because it was going in the sea-inspired blue room, I decided to distress the edges of the piece for a weather-worn look. So there you have it. A cheap makeover for a cottage by the lake feel.

Ok- here's a question for you eleven peeps. Are you over the distressed look? Is it sooo last year? Or do you still dig it? I mean, it's kinda like deodorant. It may not be for everyone...but is it for you?

Making a Garden Bed - Part 2

In part 1 of this outdoor project we tackled the painful task of clearing and turning the old flower bed. That step was definitely the hardest...so if you get through it, just remember it is all downhill from there. This was how we left the garden...


Because we decided to keep the sidewalk and the front steps, the next biggest concern was how to get the house to look balanced even though we live on a sloping hill. Like a wonderbra, we needed to fake it but make it look legit. We also needed to make sure that the ground would be graded to allow for proper waterflow.


Taking into account the fact that water is our house's numero uno enemy, we made sure that any aqua would flow far away from the house. Water can not only cause damage to the plants and cause pesky mosquitos but can actually grow mold inside your walls, ruin basements, create foundation problems, not to mention create thousands of dollars worth of damage to your exterior. If you have a problem with standing water or rain accumulating next to your home, I would recommend looking into a solution such as installing a french drain, regrading your yard, upgrading or reworking your gutters or talking to a professional about ways to improve your drainage system.

As you can see in the photo above, we reallocated some soil to ensure that the flow of any rainwater would be ushered away from the house.


In terms of leveling the ground, we had a great reference point of what is level....the bricks on the side of our house. We just chose a brick and made sure the soil was even across that line. But maybe you don't have a brick line like us...there are ways to make sure you still get an flat yard.



Use two sticks, some string and a level to create your own reference point. If you aren't bringing in any fill dirt or topsoil, set the string lower to the actual level of the current ground and rake or shovel till even.


Next we laid out our plants in their general zones. This was to help us identify different sections...we like to work in little sections at a time...sometimes the smaller parts are easier to conquer than the whole thing. And it doesn't mean that you aren't producing quality goods. Just ask Julia Dreyfus...dude, she has awards out the wazoo and what has she done except Seinfeld?


Anyhoo. After we decided what section to do first, we poured out some yummy garden soil. Yes, we bought ours. No, we don't have a compost pile. Yes, you have the freedom to judge us right now.


After it was raked evenly along the area, it is time to turn the bed. We grabbed a few shovels and got to mixing. Basically you can till the soil yourself by thoroughly mixing the amended soil with the surrounding area of dirt. Just mix, mix, mix.


After we mixed our old and new, we leveled out the soil once more. We also walked all over it to make sure it was compacted enough so that the next rain wouldn't wash our hardwork away.

Oh and one more tip for ya...see that blue bucket in the photo above? Yeah. That is the handy dandy do-it-all bucket. You'll find that a pail can be quite helpful in any project...this time, this little baby was my weed/rock/stick/root holder. I kept it next to me pretty much at all times. Like a sweater, this bucket had my back :)

So there you have it...more gardening...did you guys take advantage of the weekend by spending it outside? Have you started your flower-plans? Do tell...and like my blue bucket of fun, share any tips you have for beginners....heaven knows I need all the help I can get!

Linen Closet Organized

This is a boring post. But if you are already bored, it won't hurt to read. Or if you are looking to become un-bored, get a bag of marshmallows and stuff one into your mouth every time you read the word "STUFF" - then say the title of this post after each mellow - it's like playing Chubby Bower Power. One million points to those who can do more than six marshmallow. (STUFF)



Our linen closet is in the upstairs hall. And we just STUFFed it full of STUFF to make room for more STUFF in other areas. By now it is a mess full of my old apartment STUFF, Jeremy's old apartment STUFF, STUFF we have acquired during our marriage, and a good deal of new STUFF.


And now for my boring after. Yup, nothing color coded or labeled or with shmancy organizers from a Home STUFF store. Just the ole fashioned stacked items. We do keep a heck of a lot in there though. Look at all this STUFF -

5 pillows, 2 sleeping bags, 7 blankets, 1 heated blanket, 2 body pillows, 6 sets of queen sheets, 1 extra duvet cover and shams, 7 beach towels, 2 sets of twin sheets, one mattress protector, and all the ironing STUFF! STUFF, STUFF, STUFF! (that is for those people with giant pie holes)

And that is after we purged a lot of STUFF! Having all that STUFF organized instead of just STUFFed in feels really good. So have you cleaned your linen closet lately? Find any weird STUFF? I found a dropcloth. Complete with paint stains and pine needles. Stranger things have happened :)

Okay I am done with the boring post - so like scrunchies and tightrolling, I am out. (STUFF!)

Slain with Polystain

Right now I am focused on getting the den done. I want it to feel like the Paula Deen of dens....I want it to draw you in with a warm and cozy spirit...I want it to feel like it has been around a hundred years but not stuffy...I want it to make me smile.

Ya'll remember my conundrum?


Yupperdoodle. Five different wood finishes. So I got to work to remedy the color problem. The table in between the chairs (#4) and the dresser (#1) needed to be morphed into a more sophisticated version of themselves. I conjured the makeover powers in the movie Princess Diaries where Anne Hathaway goes from 'nerd' to 'word' - and hoped that I could be as effective as Julie Andrews...dude, is there anything that woman can't do?!?


Just take a gander at the top of this dresser. The shame. But what can you expect for $25 at Goodwill, right?


Our original plan was to use Minwax gel stain in walnut. But nobody sold that color. I found that out after calling 17 home improvement stores...so I bought hickory instead. We sanded the pieces lightly to make sure that the stain would stick. And here are the results after two coats of gel stain...


Less dramatic than a Hugh Hefner breakup (or three). The problem with the gel stain was that you had to wipe the thick-as-butta stain off after you let it sit for a few minutes. The longer it sits - the more time the wood can suck the color. But the longer it sits - the harder it is to get it off. I could only convince my boyfriend to assist me with two coats... I needed a hero and fast.

Enter Cabot Polystain. I picked up a jar of Dark Oak in satin finish...it's the butter on my pecans...it's the sugar in my grits...it puts the purr in perfect! Sure, it takes a million thin coats - but there is NO WIPING OFF REQUIRED :) By the time I finished the first coat, it was dry enough to apply the second.

Twenty-five or so coats later....


...our curvy little side table matches the flanking bookcases.

And the moment you have all been waiting for....dim the lights please...our new princess of the den is ready for court -


I couldn't believe it either :) Let's look at it one more time:


I am officially on the Polystain train. I am slain with Polystain. I would love to obtain, sustain, explain the Polystain campaign with plain Jane, Elaine and Wayne in Maine while drinking champagne. Can you tell I have Polystain on the brain? (heehee)

I loved this product. And the results were fantabulous, no? So the question is...did you guys know about this? And if so...why didn't you tell me?!?! One hundred points to those of you that wanna join the Polystain chain gang.

Not so Gore-y Anymore-y

Jeepers-creepers! Maybe three of you were around when I first talked about our friends, the Gores, who bought a lake house chock full of potential. Now that there are like ten of you (holla 300% increase in readers!) I wanted to share the finished product.

and peeps, you wanna buckle your seat belt for this one. and wear a helmet. preferably a full faced one.

Before the room was a bedroom. With hunter green carpet. Let's just say that it was as so ugly that if you threw it on the beach, cats would try to bury it. That's my little Jeremy (with the red shirt) when we went up to build stuff and teach drywalling 101. Isn't he a cutie?

After the newly bedazzled kitchen is totally drool-worthy. All new stainless-steel appliances, new hardwood floors and a fancy new layout were just the start to a drop-dead gorgeous space.

In order to get the new wide entry into the kitchen, a wall had to bite the bullet.


And this was how Jeremy & I left it the last time we came to visit.



After four months, this baby is definitely an improved view. Not only does the punched-out doorway allow for more light to be shed into the kitchen and the great room, but the flow of the house has improved a trillion percent. Plus the view down to the lake from the kitchen is to DIE for. literally. you must die if you don't love it. I have all the Bower Power and if you don't like lakehouses, you must go away. just kidding. only sorta.



Back to non-rambling. The view from the kitchen into the great room before. Yes that is me. no...the other one...the one in the back.



And TA-DA! Fab, right? Dontcha just love kitchens where you can watch Girls Next Door the kids in the living room?



When the boys took down a closet, it opened up a bunch of space for a....

...wall of custom cabinetry! I am totally digging the antiqued and rich looking white cabinets that just scream "I AM A LAKE HOUSE!" and the dark cabinets with the same details that form the island. Hello beautiful, come to momma.

And the hidden hood is just icing on the cake at this point. Like none of that gross plastic icing but the good stuff...like homemade cream cheese icing or a lemon glaze with just enough tang or a sweet buttercream icing that could send you into a diabetic seizure....all which are going to be easy to make now that the Gore's have this GORE-geous space!